Let's Get Busy Dying or Lets' Get Busy Living

Your life is as fulling as you allow it to be, in other words, you and no one else controls your own enjoyment of life, your own excitement and your own happiness. So if you are sitting there reading this blog don't ever feel sorry for your self and wish you were in my shoes, cause brother, it's all in your hands. This, my friends, I have discovered myself. If you have been reading my adventures, it has now been several weeks since my "Lost week end" and I am still recovering from that unbelievable five days. I have had some slow days where I have not been with anyone and just stayed home to recover and digest all that has happen to me and I have had some nights I have gone out in the middle of the week, get only two hours of sleep, fuck my brains out and am a zombie at work the next day. Something new occurred two Mondays ago, Susan the 43 year old finally succumb to my charm and came over my house on a Monday night. She is as hot as her pictures and is probably the smartest of the three. She absolutely loves music, is a talented sketch artist and has an IQ of about 145. Yet she continues to have relationship problems with men and can't find employment. Here is a quote from one of her last e-mails to me,
" I do think about you J....., and wonder. But I know me, I know if someone tries to get close to me, I bolt, I run, I panic. If I've told you anything about my time on this planet, then you might be able to draw your own conclusion as to why, but I'm a very lone person. I have very few friends, none that come over and sit down and just chill. I don't go hang out at their houses. I'll help anyone out in a heart beat, or go meet at a restaurant, bar sometimes.
I believe I was meant to be alone. I am comfortable like this. The last guy I dated would say things like he wasn't happy unless we were together. That's a lot of pressure, for one thing being together all the time just to ensure someone else is happy, no thank you. Second, I don't want to be responsible for his happiness, and I don't want to have my happiness depend on him. I don't want to depend on anyone, cuz people are flakes, and you can't trust em. Look at me, I a perfect example".
As you can see she definitely has some insight and is a deep thinker. But she is so fucking hot I just can't believe no one is hitting that right now. We were together and she talked all night and shared many things with me and I could tell she has been missing male company. We had dinner and sat out in my back yard listening to music and talking. I did not make a move, I felt it would cheapen the moment. This women is fucking hot, 36 Cs, size 6 and beautiful green eyes and on top of it all she is smart and deep. We made plans to go out that weekend and she said she would come over and spend the day and evening with me. I was on top of the world that week and I knew I was going to have one hell of a day and night. That Thursday wild- ass Jenn came over, We drank, listened to music and danced went to the store to buy her daughter a pinata and she left about 1-2 am. Something was troubling her and we did not have sex. I am beginning to see beneath that great crazy mind and body and Jenn is a troubled soul right out, but she is so hot and loves to have fun, ahhhh who gives a fuck!!!!, this 30 yr. women is drop dead gorgeous and is still wants to party with this old fuck!!!!! Again I got very little sleep but made it to work the next day. The weekend was a bust with both Susan and Jenn, Susan got sick and had to go to the dr. anyway that's what she told me, she might have just got scared about getting too close and sharing too much about herself and Jenn had to work both Friday and Saturday. She finally got a job as a sever in a restaurant near her house. I stayed home on that Friday to get some sleep and on Saturday I rode my Harley all day and ended up at the Steelhorse Bar. I met Dee, a early 30's blond from Philly, lives in Anthem, works for the Santa Fe Railroad and rides her own Harley. We made plans to take a ride next weekend. She is reserved, has a great body and tits and is hard to figure due to being so quite. That Saturday I came home alone and was bummed out, but later realized that my slow day was way much better than many old farts best day. I met Dee, was with two beautiful women during the week, got hit on at a club I stopped by after I left the Steelhorse but didn't follow thru with it and that Sun. I rested and did my taxes. So you can't hit a home run every fucking weekend just a few singles and doubles during the week. As what has happened to me before, just when I think things are dead and my run is over, I went over to Wendy's apt last Thursday and she treated me as she had not seen me for a year. She explained that just because she has not called me did not mean she did not want to see me or be with me????? Yeh, I know sounds rather suspicious to me to but when I'm with her she treats me like I am the only one, like a king, kinda like a ....... You know, I just don't wanna go there cause all that kinda of thinking just fucks things up and I become too analytical, too cautious and who gives a fuck anyway. She has not asked me for anything, tells me she is falling in love with me and wants me to meet her mother and sister. Things have picked up with Wendy but I will share that in my next episodes. Never-the-less she has risen to the top of the list right now and I am taking my adventures to the next level. Remember, don't sabotage yourself, don't establish your own barriers and complain about how boring your life is. Don't become complacent in your own life. You establish and control you own standards and there is no rules on going for it all!!!!! Don't think about being with someone you know you have to be with, go for that person you can't be without!!!!!!! . And so it continues, next I will share with you my trip to San Deigo, my possible venture in a partime business, my next Mans Rule Poker Party and my wild and crazy time I had at a Nudist resort. Hard to believe but all of it is true, BALLS TO THE WALL BABY!!!!!!